An Ode to Alka-Seltzer


(On a lighter-note from this morning’s post, I currently have a tummy bug AND a budding sinus infection.  This is leaving me rather foggy in my mind-ables, which resulted in the poem below.)


An Ode to Alka-Seltzer (and Alka-Seltzer Cold)

Oh sodium bicarbonate and aspirin

What relief I find in your medicine

How quick they enter into my system,

Though the bubbly way in which you transmit them

Makes me retch

Makes me bletch

Makes me etch my disgust herein.


When my tummy is angry

Your bubbles, they save me

When my head is achy

Your fizzies, they soothe the pain

So I may do my work again


But in your effervescence

I find no evanescence

I am haunted

I am daunted

I am jaunted to the last moment your elixir touched my lips

Those last horrible, no good, very bad sips


I watch the fizzies fill the cup

Thinking this time, I just might throw up

No orange or berry flavor can cover up

Your ick

Your yick

Your cure to my ills just might make me sick.

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5 Responses to An Ode to Alka-Seltzer

  1. A lovely poem. Alkaseltzer is so much better than pepto. I had an unfortunate experience with pepto.

  2. Country Chic says:

    When I was a child, I used to LOVE alka seltzer. To me, it was like getting a desert. ha ha

  3. Pingback: Steroid-Induced ADHD Mini Posts | The Perks of Being a Gemini

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